Beauty & Ashes & Sleep Deprivation

Night before last I got about 3 1/2 hours of sleep thanks to spending hours in the bathroom. I had to be on the floor of the hospital at 0615. When I came home I showered and crashed for a good hour. Having finished most of my paperwork at the hospital I decided to take the rest of the night off from school. My housemate and I watched the sunset outside on our huge porch and then created and amazing salad mixture for dinner.

Night came along with "family night" and friends over for a movie. As the day closed I sat on my floor letting a friend sob and weep in my arms as I prayed over her. Life is so full and busy that I told Andrea I feel like I'm living multiple lives. School and the hospital are one and life at the house is another. And I know we haven't even tapped into all we can do in the community as we've been focusing on building relationships at the house first and getting remodeling done.

But when I sit back I find myself amazed at this time of life and I really do feel at rest and at peace, though my body reminds me it wants a nap. Yesterday amid my other patients I got a post-op GYN case and missed midwifery all the more. Walking out of the hospital into warm sunshine I watched a new mom climbing into her car while a proud father gazed at his baby and gently kissed him before passing him on. someday....I really hope I can get back to births.